Before baby Beau arrived in our lives, I had my “thing.” I had my own routine – everything from when and where I would work out, when I would go grocery shopping, when I would be with friends, get a massage or a coveted mani/pedi and so on and so on. There was definitely my husband, Connor in my life but essentially, I was ridin’ with total freedom.

From the moment we left the hospital and walked into our front door, my entire world was turned upside down. No longer were my needs and desires at the forefront – I had no idea how I would ever leave the chair I felt permanently glued to (thank God it was a comfy chair). As someone who requires constant motion and action, this was a complete struggle. {Note the picture above – this was the week I was due with Beau and I was still working out (modified for sure!) at 40 weeks pregnant!}

After several weeks of just trying to keep my head afloat, catch moments of sleep and settle into my new role, I realized that I still needed my “thing.” I craved my routine chock-full of connections and endorphins; I still needed to feel like me within my new role as a mom and I knew if I didn’t do it soon, there would be a permanent indentation of my ass in that chair.

I listed all of the excuses that I had in my mind for what was keeping me from feeling like me – there’s not enough time, I am too tired, I am out of shape (the thought of engaging my core made me want to cry!), I don’t know where to start, what bra will I wear??, where will my groceries fit with a stroller?, what will I do with Beau? Once I actually starting to list all of the roadblocks that were popping into my head I couldn’t help but laugh at myself – these thoughts that were running through my mind were creating my reality so no wonder I hadn’t left my chair! I needed a 180 in the language I was using with myself.

To solve for not enough time, I began to plan my week in advance and wrote my workouts, lunch dates and “me” things into my calendar. I then planned around the things that were important to me to ensure they occurred.

To solve for I’m too tired, I reminded myself how re-energized and rejuvenated I felt after a good sweat.

To solve for I am out of shape, I re-framed it as an amazing time to rebuild my body slowly and steadily as I got to notice every little bit of progress each week.

To solve for knowing where to start, I just walked out my front door and started running (I still don’t even own a running stroller!) and made it 5 minutes before huffing and puffing. {I also recite the mantra my dad always used with me, “motivation gets you out the door and habit keeps you going.”}

You get the point – the language that we use with ourselves and how we frame the circumstances in our lives totally impacts how we respond to what life throws us. We can either talk ourselves up or talk ourselves down, we can control our day or be victim to our day, we can achieve our goals or we can make excuses as to why we didn’t.

I’m currently in my sweet spot where I feel like I am in control of my week and how I spend my time – where I work out, who I am having lunch or dinner with, when I am running errands and when I am getting my next mani are all in my calendar. What’s amazing is that Beau fits right into all of these activities, making my sweet spot even sweeter because I get to share it with him.

Your sweet spot is totally doable and it starts with the conversations you are having in your own mind. It is as simple as shifting your excuses into actions so that you can still feel like “you” while being the best mom for your kids.

Below are a few tools to help you hit your sweet spot and take care of you so that you can better take care of yourself and your little people.

TOOLS

• Earbuds in…
  • Susanne Conrad – Above the Line & Below the Line:
• Pens up…
  • Write down ALL of the excuses, negative thoughts and self-destructive language that pops into your head throughout the day. Once you have them written down, go through each and re-frame it or create a plan as to how to overcome it. (see my examples above for inspiration!)
    • tip: Start small. Don’t become overwhelmed with taking on too much at one. Prioritize which is most important you to and start there. It’s going to take practice!